Heaven from hell
by neko-nikki1912
Summary: Bella is changed by Maria in 1901. Jasper is ordered to train her for the wars in the south. But what will happen when they fall in love? Will Jasper be able to carry out his orders? Can they survive the wrath of Maria, and find a new life together?
1. Chapter 1

Heaven from hell

The last memory of my life is of the devil. Disguised as an angle, but the devil none the less. For the devil takes many forms. Her beautiful face leaned in, a wicked grin replacing her soft smile. I screamed as her teeth tore into my flesh. I screamed in terror, and then I screamed in pain. The last thing I heard before the fire consumed me was the devils laughter.

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The first memory of my life is of a god. A god of war battered and scared, but beautiful. He looked down at me with compassion in his eyes. Then he blinked and it was gone. In its place was a hard resolve.

The devil appeared over his right shoulder, and scowled down at me, I cringed away. She placed her had on the gods shoulder and closed her eyes. "She may be quite useful." Her angle voice rang out. The god nodded. "Get to work" the demon angle ordered, before disappearing just as suddenly as she had arrived.

There was a moment of silence, that seamed to last for ever, the gods now hard eyes staring into mine. Then he spoke. "I can feel your confusion" there was a strange calm to his voice, soothing, but with a slight warning that he was in control. " It's alright it will all make scene in a moment, you have been reborn." He stated plainly. I stared at him even more confused then I had been a moment before. He seemed to notice, for he sighed before continuing. "You are Maria's newest recruit." I knew instantly that he meant the devil had a name. Maria.

He seemed sloth to say anything else though so I opened my mouth and was stunned by the sound that came out, it was not my voice. I clamped my mouth shut and went to cover it with my hand, but the movement was to fluid and I ended up smacking my self. My eyes widened in shock. The god slowly so as not to frighten me more, moved his hand over and let it rest on my shoulder. A wave of calm washed over me and my hand fell limply back to the dirt floor that I was still laying on.

"I know this is strange miss but I am hear to help you adjust, alright?"

I nodded, then whispered, "what happened to me?" I did not want to hear the voice that was not mine, but even in the whisper was the change evident. I cringed again. His hand tightened around my shoulder, warming me slightly. But even that felt off.

"You have been changed, into a.....vampire." He said slowly placing his free hand on my other shoulder. I sat there dumbfounded, but strangely alert. The confused haze I had been in since the moment the burning ended and my eyes opened seemed to lift. I saw him clearly for the first time. He truly was a god of war. His chin length blond hair the most natural thing about him. I gasped as I took in the color of his eyes. They where blood red. Quickly I looked down trying to escape his gaze. I studied the rest of him slowly taking in his tense crouch, the position obviously picked to allow for quick adjustments to any sudden movements that I might make. As I took a closer look at his skin I flinched back causing him to once again tighten his hold on me. I slowly took in the pail stone like appearance of his flesh, but that is not what frightened me. His scares that had seemed to be such normal war wounds a moment ago where in reality small crescent shaped bite marks, overlapping and covering the majority of his exposed flesh. These scares sent my mind down another more terrifying path, and I remembered back to our conversation.

"Recruited to do what?" I blurted out suddenly. Surprised once again by the strangeness of my voice. I was afraid to hear the answer and the frown my question produced on his warrior face increased my anxiety greatly.

"You have been recruited to fight in a war." He stated slowly being careful not to overwhelm me. "Don't worry about that right now, please Mame. Everything will be explained in time, I promise."

His words did calm my near panic, but not much. He began to slowly rub his hands up and down my arms. Soothing waves seemingly rolling off of his palms. As my head slowly cleared I got the sense that as long as this god like figure was near I would be alright. He would be my ally no matter how desperate or horrible my 'recruitment' would be, and despite the fear I was still feeling I smiled. His face relaxed a little.

"Do you remember your name miss." He asked politely.

I froze at the question, panic rising in me once again as I franticly dug threw the piles of blurred thoughts and images in my head. My memories I realized with another gasp. What had happened to them? None of them seemed to be as they should be. A small portion of my mind knew the answer already. So I did not push it. There where to many other things to deal with at the moment. My head could wait.

Taking a deep breath,(and realizing with a start that I had no need for air) I started over calming myself, and focusing only on the task at hand. Remembering my name.

"Isabella Swan." I exhaled in a sigh of relief.

The god smiled. "Jasper Whitlock. It's a pleasure to meet you Miss Swan. Although you are under no obligation to agree with me. Now you must be hungry, why don't you come with me and I will find you something to eat."

At his last statement I started to hyperventilate. I had not felt hungry at all sense I awoke. However the suggestion that I might be caused a fire to suddenly erupt in my throat. I resisted the now all consuming hunger, terrified of what nutriments my body might now require. I did not know much about vampires, but the little I did know seemed to revolve around there diet. Blood.

My eyes snapped back up to meet his bright red ones.

"And what might I ask am I expected to 'eat'?" I asked harshly.

Jasper looked down at my hand, now balled into a fist in my lap. Then slowly looked back up. As his eyes once again found mine, he uttered the one word I had been praying would not be said.

"Blood."

That is when the screaming began.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Sadly I must say that I do not own Twilight or any of the characters, they belong to Stephanie Meyer.

Thank you all for the lovely reviews! They really did help me get this chapter out so soon! Although I probably would have had it out faster if I wasn't caught up in abbymickey24's lovely story 'time heals'! If you love Jasper and Bella go check it out. The twists and turns will keep you guessing the whole time! It is an incredibly well written and fun read, I got funny looks from my family for laughing so hard!

Anyway I wont keep you from the chapter anymore! Enjoy!

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As I screamed I ran. Bolting away form Jasper so quickly he didn't even have time to blink. I paid no heed to where I was going, but vaguely saw the darkness start to lift. The air getting fresher with every step I took.

I was now well past the point of being horribly surprised by anything. Regardless, after a few moments I did take note of how quickly the shrubbery flew by. I was now running faster then I had previously thought possible. Faster then a steam engine. Faster then anything else on the planet. At least anything that I have ever been aware of. This new discovery caused the velocity of my screams to increase, while my speed decreased a bit. The later was a bad move on my part. My screams turned to growls as a boulder suddenly landed on my back. Pining me to the ground with a swiftness that was staggering. I tried to roll over, but my arms where being held firmly to my sides, the wight on my back making it difficult to raise my shoulders off the ground.

"Calm down." A low voice ordered in my ear.

My head pivoted in the direction the voice had come from and I was suddenly face to face with Jasper. He sat on the small of my back, legs pinning my arms to my sides. Hands pushing my shoulders into the dirt. He leaned low over my shoulder, but seemed weary of getting to close to my face. Thats when it all clicked. 'You have been recruited to fight in a war.' Jaspers words played over in my head. The reason for the bite marks suddenly seeming all to clear. He was afraid that I was going to bite him. Oh God. I had been to turned into a bloodthirsty vampire, to fight other vampires!

"OH. GOD. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO" I screamed. Sobbing tear less sobs. My face pushed into the dirt of its own accord. By now I was shaking uncontrollably. Jasper relaxed his legs a bit, now trying to comfort me, I think. I was past noticing much. He still seemed wary of my movements, but I was aloud to wriggle my arms free. I clamped them over my mouth as I continued to sob relentlessly. I cried for my lost humanity. I cried for my new required diet. I cried over the fact that I was expected to fight. Then I cried over the fact the the vampires I was expected to fight where probably just like me. Innocents turned into monsters against there will. Lastly though I cried for my family. There memories where so faded now, clouded, but I could still feel my love for them and theres for me. What would they think of me now? My beloved parents, my little brother, who had just turned 5. He would now have to grow up without his sister. Would they believe me dead? Would they bury me? They would never find my body of course. Still the idea of my funeral seemed fitting. I was as good as dead anyway. Perhaps I was dead. There was still so much to learn, so I wasn't sure. Why would they need soldiers if they where already dead? Can a person die twice? Or more to the point can a vampire die?

I don't know how long I lay there. It could have been minutes or hours, but gradually I started to gain back my self control. As I did I became aware that Jasper was still straddling my back, only now he was rubbing my shoulders in a manner that could only be seen as comforting. Once again I felt the bizarre waves of calm rolling off of his palms. It wasn't only coming from his palms, I realized with a start. Calm seemed to be flowing into me from wherever our body's touched. The air was hung heavy with it as well. Was he doing that? It sure felt like he was. I decided not to question it at the moment however.

The idea of escape had arrived, and with it all else was forgotten. I took a moment letting the calm flow into me, and thought of my options. I couldn't think of many. There where to many unknowns. To many questions to be asked. I decided patience was my best plan for the time being.

Sighing I tried to push my self up onto my elbows. Hoping to get a better look at my surroundings, but once again Jaspers strong hands where pushing my shoulders back in to the dirt.

"Oh no you don't miss. Me and you are going to have a little talk before you get to move." Jasper spoke from behind me, his back now straightened into more of a sitting position. I let out a small growl of annoyance that surprised even me, but nodded and stilled my struggling body. Wondering what I would learn from this little talk.

"There are some rules around hear that you are in great need of hearing." He paused for a moment awaiting my response. I grudgingly gave another small nod.

"Good, now that we are in agreement, I want to start by apologizing for my forwardness in sitting on you now, and for rubbing your back how I was a moment ago. My reasoning for the first is I think was made quit clear from your little escape attempt. As for the second, that reasoning will come later. In the future however I wont be so kind. Most don't even get an apology, you are intriguing, so you get a little leeway. But if you want to continue existing you will follow the rules I am about to tell you. Are we clear?" As he spoke he had slowly leaned forward and by the end of his little speech he was once again speaking into my ear. His cool breath making the hair around my face flutter slightly. I gulped at his warning but nodded again, noting the fact that I could indeed die.

"Rule number one. No one is aloud to leave camp without first being ordered to do so, by either Maria or myself. Understood?" I was getting sick of nodding, and he clearly expected an answer. So this time I replied with a small "yes".

"Rule number two. No screaming, it gets the others riled up. You are lucky you didn't cause I riot with that one. Something you really don't want to do. They would tear you up ..." The other's?" I asked cutting him off mid sentence.

"Our coven is 17 strong at the moment. You Miss Swan have brought us up to 18, and we will be turning another 2 in the next week or so. We like to keep the number around 20. Now do you understand about the screaming?" I shuttered but nodded, to rattled to reply any other way. 17! How was I ever going to escape this place. A sudden desolation started to take over, and as jasper continued, he took back up rubbing those calming circles, only this time on my spine.

"Rule number three. There will be absolutely no feeding without permission. Once again that permission is only to come from either Maria or myself. This in many ways is the most enforced rule of our coven. Anyone caught breaking it will be severally punished." "That wont be a problem." I quickly affirmed. He sighed but continued on.

"Rule number four, goes hand in hand with rule number three. Don't let yourself be known to the humans. No one is aloud to leave the compound during the day. Unless they are going to train in a designated location, and first make sure that there are no humans in the area."

" Rule number five, you will train to fight every day, and always with me present. Also no fighting is aloud unless you are training. Fighting out of my presence is a good way to get yourself killed."

"You control emotions don't you Jasper?" I asked when he finally stopped talking. My nodding had been continuous since he resumed the list, after speaking of the coven. So he had no need to stop for my agreement. I figured he was done. At least I sure hoped so.

He chuckled softly to himself before replying. "Ah, you do catch on quickly. I wasn't sure if you would notice."

"Its kind of hard not to when you are rubbing calm into my back!" I snapped.

"Yes but it doesn't seem to be working very well. Now dose it?" His rebuttal was swift, and I got the sense that he was teasing me.

"Dose it generally work better?"

"Yes, if I was using this much force on one of the others they would not be able to move. Or speak for that matter." He chuckled once again.

"And that is why I am intriguing?" I asked trying to get as much as I could out of him.

"One of the reasons.... Another is why you are able to pay attention and carry on a conversation, especially when you have yet to feed." I shuddered as he mentioned feeding, and just like the first time panic started to rise in me.

"I wont. I can't. Please don't make me!" I sobbed out. Desperate for an escape from this waking nightmare.

"Why not aren't you starving? I don't understand your aversion, or why you panic every time it is mentioned."

"No I am not starving! And what I don't understand, is why you don't have an aversion? We are talking about peoples lives here! You are asking me to go and kill some one, just as easily as if you where asking me to eat an apple!" I spit the words at him with as much force as I could muster.

He sat there for a moment stunned, before he spoke again his voice soft.

"Miss Swan, I may be a monster. In fact most of the time that is how I see myself. That being said I do not relish the thought of killing humans. It saddens me to no end. But it is something we all must live with, if living is what you call it. There is no other way. Yes you can resist for a little while but eventually the thirst will take over. You will lose control, and when that happens there is no choice. That is the way of our world."

"But I am different right? The fact that I feel no thirst proves that!" I cried out, begging it to be true.

"I don't know. It's a possibility. You are very different from any vampire I have ever meet, and the fact that you are a newborn makes you all the more extraordinary. You don't have to feed if you do not wish it. We will see how long you can hold out."

"Thank you Jasper." I said sighing in relief.

"It's nothing, just consider it a test of your ability's." He replied pushing off of me. Finally releasing me form his grasp. He came to stand in front of me, and offered me his hand. I took it begrudgingly and he pulled me up off the ground.

Looking around I was finally able to take in my surroundings for the first time. We where standing in the middle of a large field. Although it was in grave need of a plow. There was a small house surrounded by trees off to the right, and that to was in need of help. There wasn't much more to be seen in the area, except for a small outcropping of rock in the distance, the opposite direction from the house. This however is what Jasper seemed focused on.

"We should head back, its not good for me to be gone for so long." He said his tone suddenly worried. He started pulling me along before I had a chance to respond. It was only a matter of seconds before we where standing in front of a large hole in the rocks. He ushered me inside as I wondered how I had no memory of climbing out this way. It was quite rugged and I would not have been able to make it had I still been human.

Jasper registered the sound before I even noticed it, and started pulling me along at a faster pace. I on the other hand had the opposite reaction and tried to stop dead in my tracks. Turning to me Jasper growled and tugged harder, I moved a bit but was able to stand firm.

"Look. I have to get down there now, and there is no way I am leaving you hear so you can run away again!" He growled in my face, before turning and charging back down the passage. After another moment of being dragged into hell, he had had enough and flung me over his shoulder. One hand holding firmly to my hair. Making sure my teeth got no ware near his back. A moment latter I was being flung into a corner, and Jasper was charging into the midst of five snarling vampires.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Ok so first off sorry this took so long. I was a bit intimidated by this chapter i must admit. Then to top it off I had the baby all weekend, which is usually when I wright. Thank goodness for queen of the dammed soundtrack though! Got my head back in the game!

I must also send out a thank you to my reviewers, and add that twilight dose not belong to me.......

anyway enjoy!

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I could only sit and stare from where I now coward in the corner. The upper half of my back pushed up against the wall, while the lower half was curled up into the fetal position. Completely surrounded by 10 other vampires all with the same ominous red eyes.

Fortunately those eyes weren't focused on me. Everyone of them staring intently toward the other end of the large cavern, watching with varied defensive postures what was illuminated by a single lantern hanging from the middle of the battered ceiling high above. I now assumed this extensive cave system to be home. Well there home, I wont be here long enough to call it that. If I hadn't been so terrified by what I now witnessed I would have been high tailing it out of here. While praying to what ever still listened that no one noticed. Instead here I sat stuck to the wall like glue, eyes huge and mouth agape.

I would never doubt Jasper when he warned me about his dark side. Not that I had before by any stretch of the imagination, the way he had run me down and pinned me proved that. He was powerful, and used that power to it's full extent. But nothing in this short hour emersed in this hellish new world could have prepared me for his power in that moment. The confidence and expertise in which he ran into the midst of the five feuding vampires.

Jumping on the biggest one first he dropped him in a second. The others slowing from the waves of lethargy he was sending off. The only problem in his attack was he could only drop one at a time, and the other 4 though slightly subdued continued to snap at each other. The one farthest from Jasper managed to get a bear hug onto the slightly smaller male fighting next to him. Sinking his teeth into him and riping a large chunk of flesh out of his shoulder. At that a loud cry of pain went out. Causing Jasper who had yet to move on from his first tackle, to push out with everything he had. His entire body went flying out about 10 feet before connecting with the still embracing men and knocking them to the ground.

He had somehow managed to drag the other man with him and was now in physical contact with 3 of them. He hooked his free leg around the another one and drooped him in an instant. The other 1 dropped in an instant from the force being radiated threw the 4 vampires Jasper was touching.

Standing up slowly Jasper gave the room a death glare before raining in his emotions. Although you could still feel a bit of calm in the air.

"Maria will not be pleased." He said simply, before walking away, and even I shuttered.

He slowly walked over and settled himself in the corner on the opposite side of the tunnel entrance from me. Leaning his head back he let out a breath and shut his eyes. However he did not relax, nor did I.

I had yet to move an inch from the awkward position I had taken up during the fight. With the exception of my watchful darting eyes I could likely have passed for a statue. The others had all moved as far away from Jasper as the cavern would allow, and much to my relief where all gathered at it's far wall. Once again the sense that jasper would keep me safe washed over me, and I had the feeling he had selected that spot not just to guard the door, but to keep me from harm as well.

A few members of the crowd where bickering quietly amongst themselves. Though what about I did not care to find out. The bitten one was standing away from the group a few feet, and nursing his wounds. Glancing every few seconds at the man who attacked him. The majority however where just standing there, statues like myself.

I suddenly had the feeling of eyes on me and glanced over to see jasper staring at me. I looked down uneasy but he continued to watch me curiously, after a few moments he finally broke the silence.

"We need to figure out what your gifts are." I looked up as he said this, meeting his eyes for the first time since arriving in the cavern. They now held only wonder and that same open curiosity in there ruby depths. He lunged suddenly and then was sitting on the floor in front of me, though not with out a unladylike squeak of surprise from me.

"Sorry." he said settling into cross legged position his back guarded by the wall at my side. He glanced once at the crowd and then turned the majority of his attention back to me.

"Still no thirst?" he asked laying his hand on the back of mine. The burn lit itself for a moment at the suggestion that it should be there, but died out just as suddenly.

"A little when it is mentioned, but not anymore." I replied and he nodded at my response though I realized it was unnecessary. " You felt that didn't you?" I asked looking down at our still touching hands. He simply nodded his response as he was now lost in thought.

"And you can feel the emotions I am sending you..." he let his curiosity poor out of his hand, and I felt it bubble around me like a cushion but it continued to have no effect. "..but they have no effect in changing yours?" He asked once again looking into my eyes.

I pondered his question for a moment, taking my time to decide if I wanted to be truthful with him or not. I concluded that finding out all I could would benefit me just as much, if not more then it would him, and consoled myself with the fact that he could probably feel when I was lying anyway.

However I decided to answer his question with a question. "And you can feel my emotions but not control them?" he nodded again. Unknowingly confirming that he would be able to tell if I lied, and waited expectantly for the answer to his question. I sighed but gave in.

"I believe that I can feel everything you are sending me, but it has no effect unless I want it to. If I let it in it will work but not until then, see." I let his curiosity flow threw me and was suddenly bombarded with 30 or so questions of my own. "I can also make make it stop working at will." I said as I shut off the flow of emotion from entering my body.

He however did not stop trying, and I could tell he was pushing it at me harder then before. I raised an eyebrow in question and he answered. "Just testing. I want to see if your block weakens over time. I have seen a few powers that need to be relaxed and replenished to work properly."

"Replenished by feeding?"

"Mostly yes, some however simply need a relaxed mind to gain back there power."

"And do yours need to be replenished?"

"No my gift is always strong."

"Gift so its just the one? Can there be more then one?"

"Oh there can be, you I believe have more then one though they might in reality be connected. Its to early to tell." It did not escape my notice that he skipped over the first question but I took that as confirmation.

"Mine doesn't seem to be tiring."

"I know, but it could take awhile you are a newborn, do you have to focus on it at all?"

"No. On the contrary, I have to focus to let it in, and to stop it I simply have to stop focusing on it."

"Ah. It would seem you are a shield, and a very powerful one at that, I have never before encountered a shield that could stop me."

"A shield?" I asked confused.

"Yes you can protect yourself from the effects of others gifts. I doubt any can work on you. Also I think you might be able to project. To use your shield to protect others."

"And you have worked with other shields?"

"In the past yes, I have also fought against one before, but like I said they couldn't block me. I have never even heard of one as powerful as yours seems to be." He replied with a frown that I couldn't quite figure out. I thought I had a pretty good idea though.

"I intimidate you." It wasn't a question.

He looked up surprised by my statement. "A little, I admit. That's not the reason for my frown though, you I fear are one of a kind, competently irreplaceable. Yes I'm sure a shield such as yours could be found again, but coupled with your unexplainable clear head and apparent lack of hunger, you are a true marvel to behold. A newborn with the mind set of an elder, and the control to rival any I have meet. Of course we have yet to see how you react to a humans scent." I cringed at that, and he squeezed my hand reassuringly. "Don't worry I have a feeling you will have the majority of your control left when that happens." Somehow that didn't help, but I let it go not wanting to get derailed. Something was still bothering him.

"This all sounds good to me, so what is wrong?"

"Well it is good, in a lot of ways. But it also means you have to train harder then the others, we have to work on both fighting and use of your shield. Not to mention any other gifts you may have, we have to test your control..... and we have to be quick about it all."

"Why?" I prodded felling that I was on to something.

"Why do we have to hurry your training?" He clarified. I nodded urging him along.

"Well your gifts, wont make you very popular, rather they will make you a lot of enemy's. Maria will love you, which is good, you want to stay on her good side trust me. But others will hate you. Our enemy's will want nothing more then to watch you burn, and they include some in this cave." He added in a lowered voice, that was barely above a whisper.

I could feel my eyes getting huge during his speech, and I now looked past him to stare at the others who where still spread out against the far wall of the cavern.

They where mostly men, the few woman where huddled in a group as far from the others as the walls would allow. I could only guess why, and that thought just served to terrify me more. Dragging my eyes back over to the men I took them all in slowly. They where all huge. In fact it appeared that Jasper was the smallest of them all. At least when it came to build, for he was quite tall.

When my eyes traveled over to the last of them, a round faced man with a vary large intimidating frame, I got caught. The man seemed to sense my gaze and looked up to capture my eyes. I gulped at the look in his, and averted my gaze. I still caught a glimpse of the wicked smile that crossed his lips before Jasper let out a sharp growl. Causing the man to instantly dropped his gaze, and his mouth turned back down into a frown.

"I see what you mean..." I said still shaken by the look in the mans frighting red eyes.

"He wasn't one of the ones I was referring to." Jasper said quietly looking back at the crowd. I tried to follow his gaze but wasn't quite able to before he turned his eyes back to me.

"We should get to work." He said with an urgency I had not heard from him before. I gulped again but nodded my agreement.

"Good now are you sure you arn't thirsty?" The look I gave him sent him backtracking. "I only asked because you would be stronger if you feed, stronger then any in this room."

"Even you?" I asked with a smirk.

"Well yes, but I know what I am doing and you don't." He replied in a manner that would have seemed smug if not for the worry still plainly written on his face.

"So what do we start with." Was my only response. He smiled slightly.

"Physical attack. The shield will take longer so you should be ready with a back up." He replied as he stood gracefully pulling me up to stand beside him.

"First off I want to test your instinct, I usually don't do this with newborns, but with your clear head its worth trying. I am not going to help you, just go at me with all you have, my only rule is no teeth. Alright?"

I nodded big eyed once again. He smiled reassuringly, before backing up a good 15 feet. Once he was set he motioned me forward.

I really had no idea what to do, and to be honest I felt more then a little freaked out about going up ageist him. Especially after seeing him single handedly take down 5 vampires at once. But after reminding myself about his gift not working on me, and guessing that his comments about newborns and being stronger probably meant I was about even strength with him, I felt a little better. I slowly stalked froward, still not knowing quite what was expected of me, I glanced over and noticed that all eyes where on me now. Lord help me, I thought as I scrambled for a way to not make a fool of myself. I smiled as the plan formed in my head.

As quickly as I could make my small body move I was sprinting away from Jasper. I could sense the shock coming from him, as my foot pushed me off the floor and I ran up the wall. When my feet where slightly above my head I pushed off once again, and went flying across the ceiling. I reached out smoothly and grabbed hold of the stalactite hanging directly above Jaspers head. Swiveling my body around I dropped down landing directly on top of him, and pining him face down on the floor.

"Now hows that for instinct?" I asked standing up and offering him a hand. I laughed at his expression, apparently it was his turn to have big eyes.

"Incredible." Was all he was able to stammer out, before another voice broke the silence.

"Vary impressive. Sorry Jasper but I do believe that I have a new favorite."


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N okay I know this took forever. All I have to say in my defense is that a few brain cells where missing. I think they are back again. Now that I am trying to cure myself of staying up till 5am. So I am going to post this and try to make myself sleep....**

**This ending was a surprise for me, so I hope you like it. Cause I think there are going to be a lot of surprises, this thing seems to have a mind of its own... I will be nice and say that next chapter is going to have a flash back to human Bella. So if you have any ideas for that, or anything else for that matter let me know. **

**Once again I own nothing. Enjoy!  
**

Maria smiled as she stalked towards me, brushing past a still stunned Jasper, as if he didn't even exist. I started to back away, trying to keep a steady distance from her. The now fuzzy images of Maria stalking me like this. Right before sinking her teeth into my shoulder played in the forefront of my mind, and I was more on edge then I had ever been before. Even when this had happened as a human.

"Oh don't be such a child, I thought you where much to mature for that." She purred. Taunting me. She quickened her step, and so did I, though I was starting to worry about the wall of vampires at my back. So instead of continuing backwards I began to side step, inching my way closer to the passage way out.

"Jasper relies on his gift far to much, its a weakness of his I'm afraid. Lets see if you can go up against someone with a little bit more skill. Shale we?" Sinking into a crouch as she spoke, she gave me no chance to respond before springing herself threw the air. Her hands wrapped around my neck as she flew at me with so much force that I was pushed back several feet before my heals hit a large rock and I toppled over. The rock turning to powder at the force of my fall. My head hit the ground hard as she crashed down on top of me. I hissed as her teeth once again sunk into my shoulder. The new image overtaking the fuzzy one.

"Thats to remind you to always be prepared." Maria whispered in my ear before standing up and glaring at Jasper. "It would seem like you both have some work to do Major. You have a week."

"Yes Maria. Although her shield may take longer. I have never seen one as strong as hers. She has a sound mind but a gift that powerful may take her some time to get a hold on." He replied quietly the disease plan on his face. She waltzed over to where he stood head bowed arms at his sides. Before tilting his face up so she could see into his eyes.

"Ah well then I guess it's a good thing that I was not referring to her shield. Isn't it darling" she said sweetly before placing her lips to his. She kissed him tenderly for a moment, sending a sting of something I didn't understand straight to where my heart should have been beating. Before I could analyze it to closely however she pulled away whispering so lowly that I had to strain to hear her words. "Remember who you belong to and who you are, I would hate to have to lose you...." before turning on her heal and sending a smug look my way as she brushed past me and headed for the crowd at the back of the cave.

The mood was tense as she scanned the group. However it only took her a a moment to decided who she wanted. There was a collective sigh of relief as she settled her gaze on one of the smaller males, though it was plane that he did not share the others enthusiasm.

"Kurt, come with me." She ordered as she turned and headed out the small exit, a reluctant Kurt just a few steps behind.

All was silent for a long moment after their departure. Then the next second all was just like before, the groups where reformed and the pointless arguing started up once again.

Jasper finally wiping the shock off his face, rushed over to my side.

"Here let me see that." he said motioning toward my stinging shoulder. I nodded and pulled my mess of tangled hair away. Baring my neck to him I draped my hair over my other shoulder and started working threw the tangles with my fingers.

Jasper studied the wound for a moment, before meeting my gaze. "The wound is deep, but I am going to show you how to fix it. Alright?" I nodded curious to see what he would do.

"Our saliva acts as a bandage, it fuses our wounds and allows them to heal, it also helps with the sting but that affect happens slower then the rest." Slowly placing a finger in his mouth he pulled it out and moved his hand towards my bitten shoulder.

"May I?" he asked glancing from my wound to my face and back. I nodded stilling my hands but still leaving them in my hair. Slowly Jasper ran his finger down one side of the bite mark before returning it to his mouth and repeating the process, on the other the other side of the wound. He studied my face carefully as he did, and I smiled slightly in thanks as I felt the fluid take affect.

It was then that it occurred to me how odd this was, being healed by saliva, but then I realized that like everything else in this new world my saliva had changed.

Into a bonding agent?

How had this all come about? I had originally assumed that Maria had changed me by simply drinking my blood, but that made absolutely no sense. If it where that simple there would be a great deal more of us running around. Since the others felt a massive thirst, the numbers would grow exponentially. Our saliva was a sealant, but it must also be more then that. What would it do to a human? The answer was all to clear, and also explained that hideous burning. I had no need to ask. I knew that I was right, besides that conversation would only serve to destroy my small hold on sanity. By the look jasper was giving me he would want to know the reason behind my rapidly changing emotions, so I asked the first thing I could think of to divert the conversation before it started.

"Jasper is there any place that I can go to clean up? I am covered in dirt and God knows what else." I glanced down as I spoke and for the first time noticed the dilapidated and barely hanging on condition of my dress. If I had been human still I would have been bright red at the sight of that. In fact it surprised me a bit that I wasn't blushing anyway. Yet another question for the list.

My dress was for lack of a better word dead along side me. Giant tares ran all up the front, and there appeared to be claw marks in various locations as well. The skirt was only attached on one side and hung limply down to almost my knees. If it hadn't been for my severely damaged undergarments I would have been completely exposed. I couldn't make my self look up as I pulled up the lose end of my skirt and attempted to tie it to a lose strand of what used to be fabric only to have that to fall to peaces in my hands.

I added in a whisper, "And is there anyway that I can get a new dress, the condition of this one is just humiliating."

Jasper laughed a little at that but reigned it in when he noted the squinting of my eyes as I stared at him, he gulped and nodded.

"Certainly follow me." He paused momentarily staring at the group at the back wall. They shied away from his gaze, he nodded to himself and then lead the way out of the large cavern.

We wound are way in what appeared to be the main passage as it was the only way out of the cavern that seamed to be the main 'living area.' There where other passages veering off from this one to. One smelled overpoweringly of sulfur, and I could hear the sound of water running smoothly over rocks come from the darkness.

"You can clean up down there, but let us get a dress for you first." Jasper said pointing down the dark smelly way.

"Down there? But it smells horrid!" I felt as if I would have been sick had I still been able to.

"Then don't breath." his comeback caught me off guard, and I couldn't help the fit of hysterical laughter that swept threw me. Though it didn't take an empath to know I found nothing humorous in any of this.

I could feel myself losing it, going mad. My hold had been lost.

I don't have to breath.............. I started hyperventilating just to see if I still could. It was useless.

I don't have to eat..............wait dose that mean there is no more use for the outhouse!

I laughed some more. A strange demented laugh that sounded mad. But at least I was laughing and not completely broken, like I had been in the field.

All the while Jasper was just standing there wide eyed, unsure what to do, and looking pretty concerned for what I would do next.

"What is different?" I managed to get out threw the manic laughter. At his quizzical look I added more. "What are things that have changed about me? I don't have to breath! Or eat! Or use the outhouse, I suppose. I can run like the wind! I climbed a wall, and flew threw the air! I need to know the differences. What makes us different?" Sadness had taken over my frame as I spoke, and I sank down to my knees. Completely forgetting the stench that surrounded us.

Dry sobs racked my now marble form, as Jasper knelled down in front of me and placed my face between his palms. I could feel him once again trying to calm me as he raised my face so it was level with his. Looking into my eyes, he answered my question.

"You are an immortal. You will never age and you have the ability to live forever. The only things that can harm you ever again are other immortals and fire."

I had been expecting the truth to be something to that effect. But nothing could have prepared me for the blow his words sent to my heart. The pain at this truth was unbearable, and the look on Jaspers face said that he felt the pain every bit as much as I did. Whether it be his gift absorbing my feelings, or his own letting them selfs out for the first time, I do not know. But as we sat there we wrapped our arms around the other, and held on. It felt as if the storm of emotions we where sending the other would tare us apart like a tree caught in a flood. Roots clinging desperately to the disintegrating soil being washed out from under them.

Dry sobs issuing from the both of us now, and I felt a closeness with Jasper. A sudden kinship. He was just as lost in this world as I was. Suddenly I knew that I couldn't leave this place without him, and I was filled with purpose. I would save Jasper, and I would stay in this hell for as long as it took.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: First of all, I am going to drop down on my knees, and beg you to forgive me for taking SO LONG to update! I am SOOOOOOOOO SORRY! This summer has just been crazy, and this is the first chance I got to focus on this chapter. **

**Second I want to invite you all to check out the playlist I have up for this fic! The link is up on my profile. I also (and I feel like I need to grovel for your forgiveness more after saying this) Want to invite you to check out my youtube where I have some 100 Monkeys vids up, from when I saw them in Portland this summer! **

.com/user/nekonikkigirl?feature=mhum

**Thirdly I am not Stephenie Meyer **

**Now please enjoy this long overdue chapter, with the insurance that this story will be finished! (I am just as curious to see how it ends as I hope you are!)**

Gradually we came back to ourselves. Slowly untangling from each other as we calmed. Jasper pulled me up from where we had been slumped against the wall. A pile of crushed rock forever marking the spot. He took my hand and led me farther down the stone way. We where absolutely silent as we turned into a small chamber, and Jasper lit a candle that was wedged into a crevice in the cave wall.

Before us lay pile upon pile of clothing. In all manor of style and states of repair. There was no order in the haphazard heaps. Pants tangled up in skirts. Shawls and hats mixed with jewelry and corsets. Shoes where flung into random corners there mates no where in sight. Some items where even hung on the walls with makeshift hooks carved into the rock. The majority of them inside out.

I looked to Jasper for comment but he simply motioned me forward. Before stepping back and leaning against the wall near the entryway. He seemed for the first time relaxed and a slight smile played on his lips as he watched me. His arms folded loosely over his chest. I watched him back for a moment curious about his sudden ease, before turning back to the piles of clothing and stepping to the one closest me. I removed the pants that lay on top and folded them carefully. Transplanting them to a free space on a near by stone bench. I heard Jasper chuckle a bit behind me and glanced back at him over my shoulder.

"No need to clean up, your neat piles will just get messed up the moment anyone else comes in here. Feel free to toss things around until you find something you like." He said barely able to contain his laughter, at the slightly horrified expression I could feel plastered on my face.

I frowned at everyones apparent lack of tidiness but turned back to the task at hand. Finding me a new and slightly less revealing dress. I tried not to think of the likely way these clothes where acquired as I dug threw the stacks. Quickly finding a simple gray woven skirt that fit my tastes perfectly. Soon after I pulled out a simple button up blouse to go with it, and discovered that laying under neath the shirt was a Louis the XVI style jacket that I grabbed as well. Looking down I discovered that my shoes where still In a relatively decent condition so I opted to keep them. For now. Turning my attention to a relatively organized pile of accessory's, I selected a few hair pins to help repair the tangled mess that was my hair. I considered for a moment whether or not anything else was needed. Deciding a few petty coats, a pair of bloomers and stockings as well as a corset and camisole, would be a nice backup for under my clothes. Just in case I got carried away with my new strength. Besides the style of skirt I had chosen called for petty coats, and though I would have normally tried to forgo them do to the sticky southern heat I knew that that was no longer a reasonable excuse seeing as temperature seemingly had no effect on me anymore.

After gathering the much needed undergarments I turned back to Jasper shyly. The corner of his mouth turned up slightly in a half smirk as he read my embarrassment, and I quickly tried to hide the undergarments in the bell of my skirt. Thanking my new sense of grace as I successfully hide them in record time. Had I still been human I was sure my clumsiness would have taken over and half the clothing would have ended up in a heap on the floor. Probably right along with my backside.

I glided past Jasper with my chin held high. Thankful once again that I could no longer blush, and heard him chuckle behind me. Just as the light was snuffed out. We could still see the way down the passage however, as the light from the main room seemed to give slight illumination to the most of the passage.

He was beside me in an instant. All traces of his momentary merriment wiped clean from his face. He drew in several deep breaths as we reentered the main hall, then relaxed slightly. Leading the way back to the reeking sulfur pit.

"It looks dark from here I know, but there is a small hole in the ceiling that allows in light. Their are soap and washcloths down there as well. Don't get any ideas about escape though, I will be right here listening to your every move." His eyes racked over my body quickly and one side of his mouth turned up slightly. I could feel my eyes getting huge, as I gaped at him. He chuckled at my shocked expression and gestured me down the hall.

"I do apologize, I am quite out of practice with being a gentleman." He said shyly.

Unsure of what to say I simply nodded sweetly in reassurance, and turned on my heal heading down yet another passage from hell. My suddenly heightened self consciousness did not help matters in the slightest.

At least I would soon be clean, well as clean as that horrid smelling water can get me. Wanting to get this over with as quickly as possible, I dashed down the quickly brightening passage. I had stopped breathing the moment Jasper had tolled me he would be listening. He had said not to breath but I really didn't see how that would help, the stink was already in my lungs. I released my breath hoping that the lack of air altogether would help. It didn't really it smelled nearly as bad going back out. Great, I thought as soon as all my air was gone. Empty lungs where just plain uncomfortable. Cringing slightly I drew in a small breath, and started gaging. I was now standing at the waters edge, and the reek it had up close was a hundred times worse then it had been at the entrance. I nearly turned around and ran back out.

"I tolled you not to breath." his voice echoed down the hall.

"You should have added that I should stop before reaching the entrance then." I shot back angrily.

"You know I'm standing at the entrance right? It's not that bad... Out here."

"Then you must be immune." I huffed out. I tried to quickly undo the buttons of my tattered clothes, but in my hast kept pinching the buttons to dust. Exasperated I simply riped the garment off and tossed it into the corner, where there was already a small pile of rages gathered in a filthy mound.

"Hardly. We don't get immune to scents. This smell never dulls I have just learned to ignore it."

Ignore it! I wasn't sure that was possible. It was quickly overpowering my other senses, and I was quite tempted to simply throw my new clothes on and high tail it back to Jasper and the way out. But then I looked down and gasped in horror and revulsion. My entire lower body was covered in fecal matter. I stood there in utter shock for a long moment just staring at the brown slime that covered the majority of my legs and torso. Disgusted and with a new found sense of purpose I pulled myself out of my shocked stillness and snatched a handful of rages form the corner. Quickly getting to work.

One good thing about this new 'life' I quickly realized was the fact that my new skin was very easily cleaned. One hard swipe from my old clothes, and the majority of the caked on mess was gone. However easy it was to clean myself up, I could not say the same for my rags. They where all ready rank. In more ways then one I realized in shame as I inspected my old top. Christ almighty I had vomited to! I quickly felt over my face, pleased to discover it seemed to be quite clean.

"Don't be ashamed, it happens to us all." Jaspers voice echoed down the hall, and I remembered that he was still reading my emotions like a book. However I still found it customary to make sure we where on the same page."What happens?" I asked back sheepishly.

"The purging of bodily waist during our change." He stated matter of factually.

Oh, I guess theres no beating around the bush with this one, I thought. As I stared wide eyed down the hallway. It was strange to find that the bluntness of his statement had in fact made me feel a bit better.

The near silent but humor filled exhaling of air, I heard from the other end of the hall. Was all I needed to let me know that my relaxation had been noted.

"You know I don't think I really like that gift of yours." I huffed.

"I'm not surprised, nobody ever dose. Just be glad you don't have to deal with the full force of it like everyone else." He replied with a humor filled voice.

"Oh I am, trust me"

"Darling theres no need to trust you, after all I could tell if you where lying!"

"Oh you can?"

"In the beginning always."

"Why just in the beginning?"

"I have tolled you to much already..."

There it was the brick wall, I had been waiting for that to go up. My new goal along with getting all the information I can get is now to get Jasper to trust me. He had already showed me a part of him, that was plainly obvious no one else had ever seen. I had a feeling the latter might be easy. However my feelings gave me away and if I pushed at this moment there was no way he wouldn't know. So with a stubborn sadness I decided to change the subject, and gain him trust in that way.

"How old are you Jasper?" Aw Perfect a change of subject that only slightly changes the subject!

" I was 17 years old when I was changed." He replied simply. Evasive much? I thought as I asked again.

"When was that?"

"Back in '61, Maria has a thing for military men." Aw so Maria turned him, figured as much. Wounder how old she is?

"So you where in the war?" I asked. Just as I scrubbed the last bit of filth from my body, and reached for the first of my new garments.

"I was the youngest major in Texas." He said proudly. As I struggled to get into my corset without tearing it to pieces. He chuckled.

"Are you in need of some help in there?"

"No! I can do it. I'm just going slow cause I'll rip it other wise."

"Well if you change your mind..." He trailed off feeling my embarrassment, which I'm sure was rolling off of me in waves.

"Sorry it dose take awhile to adjust, I know. You are doing exceptionally well. Most require multiple tries to get in to a single item."

"You must go threw a lot of clothes then." I felt oddly ill at that thought. Once again wondering

how they where acquired. He must have picked up on that because he quickly changed the subject.

"How old are you Isabella?" He asked almost urgently.

I wondered at that urgency for a moment, but let it go as I got lost in my head. Why was it so hard to remember such a simple fact? I am... I am... I am...I don't know how old I am...I could feel the calming waves being pushed at me and for once I let them do there work. I felt better at once and was able to focus. Taking a deep unnecessary breath, I dug deep into my mind and suddenly there it was.

"18" I breathed out in relief. "I'm 18 years old."

"Ah an older woman." He said teasingly, before adding in a more sincere tone. "Thank you for letting me help."

"I guess thats one way your gift is helpful. Your welcome." I said as I finally got my corset laced up. I fumbled with tyeing it but managed a knot in the back after a moments effort. I figured it wouldn't need loosening nowadays anyway.

"There are many ways my gift is helpful. I most likely would no longer exist without it, and then where would you be?"

I shuddered at the thought. All the things that would be different if Jasper was not here to help me, threw this darkness I had awoken into. I would have no protector. Sure Maria would probably forbid anyone from harming me. But she gave me the feeling that she would kill me herself if I made a mistake. A protector she is not. Then again if I am being quite honest, I would rather die then be in her care. At least she did one good thing in her putrid existence, she made Jasper. Who though terrifying I can already call my friend. Something I wouldn't have expected only an hour ago, and something I gather he never expected to be called again.

As if he could read my mind he said. "You know we can only be like this when we are alone right?" Sensing my sudden sadness he added. "Maria grows more tired of me by the minuet. She already senses my weakness for you. If she feels that I am a threat to what she wants she wont hesitate to take me out. After all, she already has my replacement."

At that thoughts of escape once again flooded my mind. I knew however that it was to soon to bring it up to Jasper. I had so much more to learn before I could wisely do that.

"Am I your replacement?" I already knew the answer but asked anyway hoping to learn more about our predicament.

"Yes, and that makes the situation so much worse. Because you are a more powerful weapon then I am. At the moment you are what she wants most. My weakness for you could get in her way, and she knows it."

"Well I don't want to replace you. So what are we going to do?' I asked as I slowly relearned how to button my shirt.

"I don't know yet, I'm working on it though. Just go with me on things, be quiet and agreeable stick by my side and I promise it will be alright."

"I trust you."

"You shouldn't. But I thank you for it." He said sadly.

"I get the felling I'm the only one that should."

"Perhaps." Was all he said to that.

The silence stretched on after that, as we both drifted off in thought over what had just been said. I finally finished dressing after a few moments. Having managed not to harm the delicate fabrics one bit. I shrugged into my jacket and pulled my boots on quickly before making a run out of the stench and back to Jasper. My hair was still rather a mess but I could care for that elsewhere. So I stashed my hair pins in my pocket. I did however start running my fingers threw it, as I made my way back. As I rounded the final curve I heard jasper catch his breath and looked up just in time to catch the awed look on his face. Before he covered it up with a shy smile.

It seamed he was about to say something, as I stopped before him, but was cut off when there echoed a faint scream from another part of the cavern. Jasper tensed immediately, muttering something under his breath.

There was a moment of silence then, that seemed to last forever as we stood there. Just staring at each other. Me I'm sure with a look of bewilderment on my face, and Jaspers full of fear as he struggled to put on his mask. For once it wasn't working.

Another scream issued from the darkness, ending the moment and snapping Jasper back into his warrior mode. His mask finally falling in place. He grabbed my hand as he began to run, leading us back to the main room. He spoke lowly but did not look back. "Remember what I tolled you. Maria is back, bringing with her a new recruit. He is still turning, But will be vary dangerous when he wakes up. Keep back and don't draw attention to yourself. I will be watching even if I appear not to be." "yes." was all I managed to get out before the entrance of the main room was before us. Jasper squeezed my hand and then dropped it a moment before we came into view of the others. I slipped back into what now appeared to be my corner and watched. As Jasper silently helped Maria by calming the riled up crowd. I let that calm flow into me and silently thanked him for it. Though I knew that this time it was not directed at me.

Another scream pierced the room, and you could almost taste the agony that caused it. An agony that I could remember all to well. I looked over at the sound, and saw Maria bent over the thrashing body of a man. A man who's face though deformed in agony I knew. A man who's face caused my whole mortal life to flash before my eyes. A man who just a short 2 months ago I had married. My husband.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N Ok so first off I have some bad news, I have double the good news though so please don't hate me to much. Bad news is that cliffy is going to be killing you for a bit longer... I know, I'm a horrible person**, **and I am really sorry for that. However I felt that the story would flow better if I put in a Jasper pov before things get going. So that is my first bit of good news! You get the Jasper pov that a lot of you have been asking for! The other bit of good news is that Bella's next pov is nearly complete! I actually wrote most of it before even starting this, so as soon as I get (and once again don't hate me for this) Jasper's pov part two written up that will go up with it! Sorry for the wait, and hope you enjoy! **

**P.S. I am not Stephenie Meyer, and I don't own Twilight.**

** Jasper's POV  
**

The moment Maria brought her in I knew that something in me had forever changed, and I was done for. This notion was disconcerting to say the least. The realization that one moment could alter what I had thought to be a unchanging mindset stopped me in my tracks, at least mentally if not physically. The fact that this change could be caused by a creature on her way to being part of our army took my unneeded breath away. For the first time in my 40 year existence I was at a loss.

Her sent was lovely, enticing, and yet there was no blood lust to accompany it for she was already turning. Her screams of agony pierced right through my long dead heart, the way nothing had ever done before. I was the fucking god of war for Christ sakes! Yet here I was wanting to protect her, defend her, and take away her pain. I head seen hundreds of humans make the change to vampire and not once did I want to sooth their screams, nor had they ever really effected me. The pain of the burn was just the beginning of their suffering, and if they knew what was going to happen next I bet they wouldn't want to wake up from it. I am pretty damn good at winning bets.

But she was different. There was no doubt in my mind what had just happened to me. I have seen it before. Felt the change in others emotions, and destroyed it over and over again. But to feel it for myself was another thing altogether. I had just found my mate in the beautiful writhing woman held in Maria's arms. Her hair, a long lustrous brown, fell away from her face as she threw her head back in agony. Her features unclear from the pain written in them. Yet I knew she was beautiful, and she was mine.

I had never been so frightened in all of my long existence. Maria was already tiring of me. She tried to hide it, but she had never quite forgiven me for letting Peter and Charlotte escape. If she had known the whole story of how I had let them leave, I'm sure I would already be deader then I am now. I guess it could be said that it was lucky that I like to do my killing in private. However even without knowing the truth Maria had lost her faith in my that day, and everyday since I had felt her resolve to end me grow. All she needed was a replacement Major, and she was looking hard. She was bringing in more humans to turn all the time, and getting rid of them just as fast. Her training had been harder. Her demands fiercer, and her expectations of me extreme. She was getting frustrated, and that was never a good thing for anyone, living or undead.

Her frustration in part I am sure came from the knowledge that she couldn't keep anything from me for long. She feared that I would turn against her, and where in the past we had often been alone together, she no longer allowed that to happen. The thing was that I had no plans to attack her. I simply wished she would hurry up and find my replacement so she could get on with it. I was tired of this half life I have been living for nearly half a century.

At least that was what I wanted until that girl came into my site, changing my world in a instant. The fear I felt wasn't for myself. I was still fine with dieing for good. Rather I felt fear for her. I wanted her afterlife to be a thing of peace, not war, and I knew that was impossible. This is how life is for our kind. Even with the Volturi there is violence and suffering and death. It is our punishment for being the ungodly creatures that we are. There is no peace for us, and we will die again together or alone. Our love can not be, and will not be allowed to last. She hasn't even opened her new eyes yet and already she is doomed. We are doomed. Maria will only end it faster if she finds out, and the girl will need my training if she wants to have any chance in this hell of a life. Maria had just unwittingly gave me a reason to fight.

She gave me a strange look as she set the girls writhing body on the floor. But a sudden ruckus in the corner quickly captured her attention and she ran off without saying a word. Her distraction gave me enough time to pull myself together without her knowledge, and get back to work.

The pull to go to the girl and take away as much of her pain as I could, was strong. But I knew that I had a hard enough struggle in front of me, keeping my feelings a secret when she woke up. So I stayed as far away from her as I could, and somehow managed to keep up appearances while she burned.

I ended up taking out my new found frustration on the newborns, and Maria was visibly pleased with my vigor in training them. I felt for just a moment her resolve to end me flutter as I ruthlessly took off the head of a 3 month old named Violet. Her wistfulness to trust me again flared for just a moment before she squashed it back down. But I felt it, and it was all I needed to give me the drive to push through. I held up the decapitated head by its wavy auburn hair, and ignoring the howling coming out of its mouth and the writhing of its body on the ground near my feet, shouted with as much malice as I could muster, "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON'T PAY ATTENTION! SOMEONE WHO IS WILL TAKE YOUR FUCKING HEAD OFF! KEEP YOUR FUCKING FOCUS OR YOU WILL ALL BE WITHOUT ONE!" With that I drop kicked the head across the cavern, where it hit the wall with a resounding thud. I then made the others watch wide eyed as as the body crawled around on hands and knees, trying to find its missing eyes and brain.

It was a point I had made many times before, to nearly every crop of newborns. But it was not a pretty sight. The head was laying face down in the corner oozing venom from its stump of neck and wailing in pain. A big fracture covering her cheek from the impact with the cave wall. Her body was stumbling around on its knees. Hands reaching franticly around like the possessed corpse that she was fumbling around for her head. It took her a few moments to find it but once she did she had to sit there and holding her head in her hands spit her venomous saliva over the stump of neck that remained attached to her body. Finally she had covered the wound enough to reattach head to neck. The entire process was grueling and painful and left Violets neck burning and scared. She was left famished in a way she had never been before.

Her thirst turned her into a liability, so as soon as it was dark Maria took watch and I took the wounded newborn hunting. She was weak from loss of venom, and I had to help her climb out of the treacherous entrance to the cave. She wasn't to comfortable with that, and visibly flinched at my touch. Not that I could blame her. Once outside she was fine to run, much to her relief. Though she was for once slower then me, and I reveled in not having to worry about her bolting.

I had never been so grateful for the excuse to hunt as I was in that moment. It kept me from hearing her screams and feeling her agony. Though it still hurt me to know that even though I could no longer feel it she most certainly could.

Even with Violets weakened condition we made good time, and quickly located a small group of humans camped out near a trail. They where already asleep, and the two of us made quick work of draining the five men. I was generous and only had two myself. Leaving the other three to Violet who's newborn blood lust had only been worsened by the loss of her head. I was grateful that we had found the men whilst the slept. Their jumbled emotions when they awoke to our teeth penetrating their necks was so much nicer then the blatant fear of the fully awake.

Violet now rejuvenated and fully heeled after her meal, helped me to quickly strip the body's of their clothes, and ransack the wagon for anything we might find useful. In the end all we found was a lantern, some matches and some oil. We where however satisfied with that, and shoved our new possessions into a large burlap sack that we had found full of food supplies. We quickly buried the body's under a large boulder, before heading back towards our temporary dwelling.

The closer we got to the caves, the more anxious I became. The sound of her screams where waring on me, and though my meal had strengthened me it did little to help my state of mind. I wanted the burning to end that pain to be gone. But I feared what would happen when it did.

I couldn't be sure of my reaction to her when she awoke, or hers to me. She would no doubt be crazed, starving, frightened, and confused, as all newborns where upon waking. But I had also seen enough mated pairs to know that her reaction to me might be slightly different then it would be to all the other vampires in the room. If Maria saw that I would no doubt bring trouble.

On top of that however was the knowledge that I would have a hard time treating her like all the others. Not showing her favor. Hurting her. I hurt everyone. It is my job and I am damn good at it. But could I hurt her? Could I treat her like all the others when she was so much more to me? I had to do it. I had to find a way. If I didn't, if I showed her favor it would paint a target on her back. Maria would never allow me to have her, and would most likely kill her the first chance she got. Right after she ride herself of me, and I was no longer there to protect her.

I swallowed my fears as we started down the cave entry. I couldn't allow myself to lose it. Show no fear, show no mercy. It became my mantra as her screams came back into hearing range. It was horrid the way they echoed around the tunnels. I hated this place. I never thought I would be able to say that, but it was the truth. I had seen it as the perfect hide out when I had discovered it a little over a month ago, and it really was. It was large and hidden and no humans would dare venture inside. The newborns where easily contained, and there was room to spread out which helped limit the amount of fighting that occurred. There where also many areas where the walls where thin enough to escape if we where to be attacked, yet they where thick enough to have time to react if a newborn tried to escape. From a military standpoint this place was perfect. But as her screams reverberated around the halls amplifying and repeating each one I found myself fighting the urge to tear my ears off. I probably would have too if I didn't otherwise have such a need for them. It wasn't as if I couldn't just reattach them later.

My favorite base had become my prison, and I now hated being here. There was no way around it though. Training was done in the compound when a transformation was taking place. So there I stayed in the same room with her. All the while pretending she didn't exist, when all I wanted to do was hold her and take away as much off her pain as I could. I had never before felt so powerless. I was one of the most powerful vampires in the world and there was nothing I could do to help my mate. It was sickening. I had never in all my miserable existence known such a hell. This was unbearable, and yet I bore it all.

When not training I tried to occupy myself with coming up with a plan. But there where to many variables for me to come up with anything solid. I feared I would have to play it all by ear, and that did not sit well with me. I wasn't planing for one of Maria's battles, I was planing how to save my mates life. Not having a solid plan of action just served to make me feel even more useless then I already did.

At one point her body began the process of purging all of its now unnecessary waist. It was something that I was used to seeing, and never paid any mind to. But once again seeing it happen to her was something I was not prepared for. I could not stand to see her face covered in the waist she had so violently wretched out. So against my better judgment, and almost completely against my will, I found myself propelled to her side. There where others in the room. So I used the excuse of moving her flailing body from where she had rolled into the middle of the floor, back into the corner where she had been placed. I made sure to monitor the others emotions for signs that they where watching me, and quickly but gently wiped her face clean of the filth that covered it. Her body was still soft and warm in my arms as I set her back down in the corner, and I allowed myself one moment to savor the feeling before I let her go and went back to pretending she didn't exist.

It was incredibly hard to walk away from her after being so close. I clung to the feeling of her in my arms the way a human would to a warm blanket on a cold day. It warmed me even as the loss of the real thing chilled me to the bone.

I had to do something to distract myself from this madness, so I started training longer and more intensely then normal. The newborns hated it but I didn't care. They should have been thanking me for it. My madness had just upped there chances for surviving the next battle.

Maria noticed my odd behavior but chalked it up to me realizing my my end was near. She always had underestimated me. Thinking I would let her know when I figured out her plan just proved that. I had known for months without showing it. However her believing that I had just figured things out served me well in this instance so I went with it. Anything to keep her away from the truth that was writhing in the corner.

On the evening of the third day her screams began to intensify. I had been waiting for that signal that her change was coming to an end, for most of the afternoon, and I steeled myself for whatever might happen next. Maria was near as she always was during a awakening, and she would surly see whatever reactions we would have to each other.

At least the newborns where always in my care. My gift was the key to subduing them, and I felt that that fact might be my one saving grace in this situation. I rather hoped the girl would bolt so that we could be alone for a moment. Seeing as Maria would have to stay close to the rest of our army, privacy would be guaranteed.

The increased pounding of her heart let me know that the end of her burn was near. The venom changing the last of her living organs. I was finally able to go to her. I moved with barely contained swiftness to her side and waited.

Thump. Thump. Thump... Silence.

Her breath came out in a rush, and her body both relaxed and tensed at the same time. I waited with baited breath for her eyes to finally open, and I knew in that moment that I could not keep my mask in place when they did. I would not let the first image she saw in this new life to be the god of war. No I would let her see me, if only for a moment.

And then the moment arrived. She opened her frightened eyes and they instantly meet mine. I showed her my soul in that first look. Poured it into her for just a moment, and then with more effort then I could have imagined forced my mask back in place. Still her wide eyes stared into mine, and I marveled at the clarity of them. I felt Maria approach from behind me but I couldn't tear myself away from her gaze. Now that the pain had ended I could see her features clearly for first time. She was beautiful. Her big red eyes set neatly into her heart shaped face captivated me, and though my face did not show it I was lost.

The movement of Maria behind me broke the connection and she flinched back clearly frightened. I didn't blame her. I felt Maria's hand come to rest on my shoulder and knew she wanted a report on what the girl was feeling. I sent her the confusion, fear, and shocking lack of thirst that was flowing threw her, but held back for myself the feelings of awe and trust that she was unknowingly sending me. To say I wasn't surprised by her feelings towards me would be a lie. I expected some sort of reaction from her upon seeing me, but trust! That was unheard of in a newborn! Add into that the fact that she felt no thirst, and she was unlike any newborn I have ever witnessed.

I felt Maria do a quick appraisal of the emotions I had sent her and wasn't surprised when her whole mood lightened. It seems my mate was also destined to be my replacement. Great. Could this get anymore complicated? I was royally screwed.

"She may be quite useful." Maria said in a voice completely removed from the relief coursing threw her. I simply nodded my agreement not trusting my voice in that moment. "Get to work." She commanded before disappearing back to her courters. No doubt to do a private victory dance.

For a moment all I could do was stare. Drink her in before my number was up. I knew I had to say something though, Maria was still listening.

"I can feel your confusion." I said in the same practiced voice I used with all the newborns. "It's all right it will all make sense in a moment. You have been reborn." I knew this would frighten her so I sent out a small wave of calm. There was no shift in her emotions other then a growing confusion though, and I let out a small sigh that my powers had no effect. I was thoroughly awed by this beautiful girl in front of me. But I somehow managed to get more words out. "You are Maria's newest recruit." I said without really thinking about it. She flinched at the sound of Maria's name, and I instantly wished that I had thought out my words a bit more.

She opened her mouth and let out a squeak before clamping her mouth shut in surprise at the sound. She then proceeded to hit herself in the face, shocked surprise taking over her features as she did so. I decided to try a surer method of calming her then, and slowly placed my hand on her shoulder, sighing internally with joy at the excuse to touch her. This time I could tell she felt it as I pushed a massive amount of calm at her. However I was using a dose that would have dropped any of the others and yet all it seemed to do to her was ease her mind a little. For all I know she could have been responding to my touch. What was this beautiful mystifying girl in front of me. She had barley even woken up and already she was proving herself to be the most extraordinary vampire I had ever heard of. I was both in awe of her and frightened for her at the same time.

"I know this is strange miss but I am here to help you adjust, alright?" She nodded her head at my words before finally opening her mouth to speak. "What happened to me?" She asked, her voice only a whisper. She cringed at the sound of it, and I put more force into the calm I was trying to send her. It didn't seem to work.

"You have been changed, into a...vampire." I answered her question, knowing it was probably best to tell her promptly rather then annoy her by being vague. Even so I cringed as the words left my mouth. It was never an easy thing to hear, and the fact that I could not calm her worried me. I placed my free hand on her other shoulder and tried again hoping the double dose would help. It didn't. Instead her emotions got stronger, clearer. I was taken back by the force of them. A small gasp left her lips and she looked away from me in fright. I could almost hear the bells going off in her head as she took in what I was. What she now was. She appraised me slowly starting at my feet and working her way up. She flinched when she took in my scares. It was a reaction everyone had upon meeting me, and the delay in her reaction was somewhat refreshing. Still it saddened me when it came from her. I didn't want her to ever have to fear me. Yet here she was flinching away from me. My hands tightened my hold on her and she stilled instantly. Her fear only continued to increase however, but it was no longer directed at me, and for that I was thankful.

"Recruited to do what?" She asked without warning. I frowned at the question, not wanting to answer but knowing I had too.

"You have been recruited to fight in a war." I replied slowly afraid of the reaction my answer would cause. "Don't worry about that right now, please Mame. Everything will be explained in time. I promise." I added trying to calm her with my words but unsure how to go about it. I was surprised when my words did seem to help her, but I was still not satisfied, and my hands of there own accord began to run up and down the length of her arms. I was still desperately trying to send her calm, but I was beginning to think it was a lost cause. Still as my hands ran their path across her arms she began to calm, and as she did a mixture of peace, hope faith and trust welled up inside her and she smiled! It was a small smile, but it was the loveliest thing I had seen in this life, and it made my heart sing to see even that little bit of joy on her face.

"Do you remember your name miss?" I asked, suddenly desperate for the answer. I regretted ruining the moment when I felt her panic start to rise. Another gasp escaped her lips, and I feared I had triggered the rise of her normal newborn emotions. Then just as suddenly as the panic had arisen it went back down, and she seamed to go into a trance like state surrounding herself in a calm that was all her own.

"Isabella Swan." She exhaled, the relief evident in her voice. What a lovely name, Isabella! It fit her perfectly and I found myself smiling as I introduced myself.

"Jasper Whitlock. It's a pleasure to meet you Miss Swan. Although you are under no obligation to agree with me. Now you must be hungry, why don't you come with me and I will find you something to eat." I knew her lack of hunger could not last, and hoped that bringing it up would spark her thirst so we could get away from all these prying eyes. I thought for a moment that it had worked as I felt her thirst flare for the first time. But then I felt the rising terror that accompanied it

"And what might I ask am I expected to 'eat'?" She asked in a sharp voice, her eyes snapping up to meet mine. I had to look away from the intensity in her gaze. It was like she was looking right into me digging the answer out of my mind. Even though I could tell she already knew. I forced myself to meet her gaze again and uttered the one word I knew she did not want to hear.

"Blood."


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N *Peeks out from hiding place* Are you all still there? I hope so! I hate the fact that I have left you so long with no update. My computer got to the point where it would crash every time I opened word... But I got a new laptop yesterday and am back! I love this story and promise it will be completed! **

**OH, and I do not own twilight.**

_JPOV_

The force of her reaction to that one word startled me. She had already figured out that our diet consisted of blood, I could feel it. Yet at my confirmation she lost it. I had been expecting that. Having felt her panic rise, even before I said the word. But to lose it so completely after showing such control reminded me that she was indeed a newborn and not a vampire whose age surpassed my own, as her cool temper and lack of thirst had suggested just moments before.

Her screams where something I had not anticipated and my heart sank. I hated hearing the sound of them again. Especially after they had finally ceased just moments before. My heart did a flip though when she bolted. I had hoped it would happen at some point. Though my hopes had seemingly been dashed with her show of calm. I was ashamed to say I was relived a bit by her running now. However it proved to Maria that she was indeed a volatile newborn in need of supervision, and that bought me time to plan. For the moment though the important thing was her running gave us a bit of time alone. Time away from prying eyes. Time to come to an understanding.

She ran blindly, and I was surprised when she found her way out of the labyrinth of passages on the first try. It was a fairly straight shot from the large domed cavern that served as our main hall, out to the cave entrance. However there are many branches of tunnels that twisted off from the main path.

The thought of just letting her go crossed my mind. But there are many covens in the surrounding areas, and she would most likely be killed on sight if anyone found her. Besides to do such a thing would be suicide for me. Though I was not afraid of the second death, to undergo it without the knowledge of her safety would be unbearable.

I could try to fight Maria, but even with my power it would be a losing battle. I had trained the newborns well and they would defend their master to the death. Maria would hide behind them as she always did, and it mattered little how many newborns I could take down if she where to live. No, to end her I would have to get her alone. I pretty much had a snowflakes chance in hell for that to happen. She had been wrong when she had thought to have figured me out earlier. I had not planned to harm her, but her worries gained more validity every second.

Another thought crossed my mind as I ran after Isabella, and the temptation it caused almost made me over look its fatal flaw. I could run with her. Like Peter and Charlotte had done. Just run and run and never look back. But even as daydreams of a future together filled my head, I knew it could not be. Maria would never let me go, and the more I thought about it the more I realized that she would never let Isabella leave either. She was to powerful, a priceless weapon. If we ran she would follow. She would find us, and she would kill us. It would pain her to kill the girl, my replacement, but she would still do it without a second thought. She would be seen as a traitor for siding with me. A deserter for running, and Maria would see no other option then to end her on the spot. Thus eliminating the threat that Isabella's power could be used against her in the future.

No, our only option was to stay. Maria will allow me time to train Isabella. With her unheard of control upon waking, and her block of my powers, she would need me. Not for long though, the clock was ticking. I had to think of something. There has to be some way to get us out of here. In the meantime I would teach her everything I could. Give her everything I could manage. Because if Maria has her way, she will soon be all alone in this world. Without my protection, and I will be twice damned if I would let her walk this world alone while still naive and defenseless.

I watched in awe as she climbed with catlike grace out the shaft like entrance of the cave. She never once slowed as she scaled the near vertical tube of reddish rock. Even in her panic she was a sight to behold, I wasn't sure if it was my emotions for her playing tricks on me, or if she really was the most graceful vampire I have ever meet. Either way she was extraordinary, there was no doubt about that.

Her screams lost none of their intensity as she finished scaling the wall and reached the open field that lay outside the cave mouth, and her velocity increased to that of a bat out of hell. There was no way I was going to be able to catch her at this rate, and frankly I was fine with that for a little while so long as she stayed away from humans. If she got too far however we would have the other covens to worry about. With the amount of noise she was making there was no way our presence would be missed. Still the farther we ran from the caves meant the more time we would have to get used to each other in privet.

I needed to find a way to convey the severity of our situation to her without letting her see my feelings for her just yet. If I have learned anything in this life it's that newborns are unpredictable in their mood swings, and often speak without thinking. Her learning of my weakness for her at this point might come back to bite me in the ass. No, telling her would have to wait till I had a better read on her state of mind.

My thoughts where cut short with the sudden spike of her panic, and the shrill increase of her screaming, and much to my surprise the slowing of her speed. I sighed at the fact that we were not as far out as I had hoped. But knowing it might be my only chance for quite some time, I resigned myself to tackle her anyway. It only took me a couple of seconds to catch up with her at her reduced speed, and I collided with her with enough momentum to bring her to the ground. She growled as I pinned her beneath me, and struggled to free herself from my grasp. Her untrained maneuvers where easily forted with little effort from me, and her growls increased as she realized she couldn't easily free herself.

"Calm down." I ordered, leaning over so that I could speak directly into her ear. Her head whipped around to face me. She took in my position over her and calmed ever so slightly for a moment, I could sense her mind returning to her, the wheels starting to turn. Then snap!

"OH. GOD. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO" She cried. She started to sob, pushing her face into the earth as if to subconsciously muffle the sound. She was shaking with the force of her sadness, and my heart broke at the sight of her. I released her arms from my hold, and she immediately moved them to cover her mouth. I had never been as frustrated with my power as I was in that moment, leaning over her trying to calm her down as best I could. My power was useless when it came to her. I could feel everything she felt but was unable to change it. Unable to help. How messed up was that! All these years of using my gift to control and inflict pain and the one time I want to do good and help someone I can't! I felt so useless, trying in vain to calm her emotions.

Finally after what felt like hours of her tortured emotions, I began to feel them shift. Her head started to clear, and her sadness began to fade into a dull ache that flowed just below the surface. As her emotions quieted, I noticed that my hands where rubbing up and down her back in small gentle circles, and I wondered how long I had been doing that. It frightened me that this was the first time I could say I was gentle with anyone. My eyes became transfixed to the foreign sight, and in that moment I realized that I had no clue who Jasper Whitlock really was.

I was snapped out of my disturbing train of thought quite suddenly, when she tried to wriggle away from me on her elbows. I pushed her back in to the dirt as a bit of my warrior self returned to me.

"Oh no you don't miss. Me and you are going to have a little talk before you get to move." I informed her, as I straightened my back in defiance of my weakness. She growled at me but signified her acceptance in the stilling of her body.

"There are some rules around hear that you are in great need of hearing." She gave a small nod, and I continued. "Good, now that we are in agreement, I want to start by apologizing for my forwardness in sitting on you now, and for rubbing your back how I was a moment ago. My reasoning for the first is I think was made quite clear from your little escape attempt. As for the second, that reasoning will come later. In the future however I won't be so kind. Most don't even get an apology, you are intriguing, so you get a little leeway. But if you want to continue existing you will follow the rules I am about to tell you. Are we clear?" As I spoke I found myself leaning closer into her, as if by some magnetic pull that I was powerless to stop. It terrified me, how powerless she made me feel. How I couldn't stop myself from feeling for her. I hadn't felt for anyone in decades, and to suddenly feel this strongly after so long was more than overwhelming.

I started rattling off the rules of the coven, but my mind was not in it. Instead I was mesmerized by the way her hair fluttered when my breath hit it. The way her scent took over my lungs with every new breath I took. Delicious. Like the sweetest of strawberry's. The way her voice sounded when she agreed to a rule. The purest of bells.

I came out of it a bit though when she cut me off to ask about the others. But even that answer just rolled of my tongue with little thought. Her mood started to deteriorate as I continued, and I once again tried to calm her. I knew by this time that it would do no good, but the need to try was still strong.

"You control emotions don't you Jasper?" Her question caught me off guard, and I sat there stunned for a moment before letting out an amused chuckle. She's extraordinary!

"Ah, you do catch on quickly. I wasn't sure if you would notice." I replied, trying to keep the amazement out of my voice.

"It's kind of hard not to when you are rubbing calm into my back!" she shot back. So she can feel it!

"Yes but it doesn't seem to be working very well. Now dose it?" I said with a grin, eager to learn more about her gift.

"Dose it generally work better?" She asked.

"Yes, if I was using this much force on one of the others they would not be able to move. Or speak for that matter." I laughed a bit, thinking I could probably knock out the whole army with the amount of calm I was directing at her.

"And that is why I am intriguing?" She wondered. Intriguing would have to be the understatement of my existence, but it was easier to explain then all-encompassing center of my universe. And I had said it...

"One of the reasons... Another is why you are able to pay attention and carry on a conversation, especially when you have yet to feed." I had barley gotten the last word out when I felt her emotional hold fall to pieces again.

"I won't. I can't. Please don't make me!" She cried out, breaking my heart that she had no choice in the matter.

"Why not? Aren't you starving? I don't understand your aversion, or why you panic every time it is mentioned." I tried to be soothing, but without my power it was a losing battle.

"No I am not starving! And what I don't understand is why you don't have an aversion? We are talking about people's lives here! You are asking me to go and kill someone, just as easily as if you were asking me to eat an apple!" She shrieked. I was speechless, I wanted to calm her and find a way to get through to her, but was at a loss for how. More than that though I was shocked at how logical she was being.

"Miss Swan, I may be a monster. In fact most of the time, that is how I see myself. That being said I do not relish the thought of killing humans. It saddens me to no end. But it is something we all must live with, if living is what you call it. There is no other way. Yes you can resist for a little while but eventually the thirst will take over. You will lose control, and when that happens there is no choice. That is the way of our world." I astounded myself with my honesty in that statement. No one knew of my hatred for the hunt. The fear that would radiate from my prey and into me each time I feed. It was awful. But there was no other way.

"But I am different right? The fact that I feel no thirst proves that!" She asked desperately.

"I don't know. It's a possibility. You are very different from any vampire I have ever met, and the fact that you are a newborn makes you all the more extraordinary. You don't have to feed if you do not wish it. We will see how long you can hold out."

I hoped she could hold out. She was no doubt extraordinary. But I feared what would happen when her thirst did flare up. She was unpredictable, something I had never dealt with before. Newborns as a rule are extremely predictable in their unpredictability. Even without my gift their next move was always easy to anticipate, if you know the signs. But Isabella was something else entirely. She had already shocked me more times than I would like to admit.

"Thank you Jasper." She said in relief.

"It's nothing; just consider it a test of your ability's." I said, knowing my time alone with her had to come to a close. I forced myself to stand, but couldn't bear to have the connection broken yet so I offered her my hand, and nearly sighed in relief when she took it.

"We should head back; it's not good for me to be gone for so long." I hated to go back, to put us both under the surveillance that was my life. But being gone any longer would only raise suspicion with the crowd that missed nothing. We couldn't afford that. Not this soon and not ever. So I began to usher her back into the snake pit. Felling a growing sense of dread with each step forward that we took.

We were just beginning our decent when it hit me. Shit. I had been too wrapped up in my own emotions; I should have felt it sooner. There was a fight happening, a brawl with several participants. I had to stop it and now or someone would lose their head.

Isabella it seemed had other ideas and stopped dead in her tracks. I growled and tried to pull her along, but her instincts where kicking in and she would not budge. "Look. I have to get down there now, and there is no way I am leaving you here so you can run away again!" I was not surprised when I ended up having to carry her into the main hall. Something I wouldn't have minded in another instance, but at the moment just seemed to slow me down. I deposited her into a corner and quickly defused the fight before much damage was done. Much to my relief, I do not want to know what Maria would have said if I had been any later.

Afterwards I found myself being pulled to her as if by a string, and settled for sitting across the doorway from her. I sighed and shut my eyes in frustration. The last thing I needed was a mate. What am I supposed to do with her? I may love her, albeit against my will. But I can't tell her. She's a liability, a weakness. I hardly know her and yet I would do anything for her, for my bond won't let me do anything less. And yet if it wasn't for her I wouldn't care if I had a weakness. So ready for the finale death was I that until I saw her I was my own weakness. What a predicament I now find myself in. Me the Major nearing his end, weakening and giving into the weight of the evil I have done. Mated! What is this some kind of cruel joke? A punishment? Or is it a sign that I should fight on? I guess the answer is obvious, now that she's here I refuse to go down easy. And her? Well she is something else. What is she?

My eyes open of their own free will, and I find myself staring at her. Her emotions are so strange. She seems to be more traumatized than anything else. Sensing my gaze she looks up, glancing at me for only a moment before looking away. She is insecure and uneasy, and I can't really blame her. I gaze at her for a moment longer before breaking the now slightly awkward silence.

"We need to figure out what your gifts are." I say, and she finally looks me in the eye. The compulsion to be near her in that instant is overwhelming, and the next I am by her side. My sudden nearness earns a squeak of surprise from her.

"Sorry." I say before I can stop myself. Damit! Now I'm apologizing. The Major never apologizes. I survey the troops but thankfully no one seems to be paying much attention.

"Still no thirst?" I ask by way of subject change. I reach for her hand so I can 'feel her emotions better' ha! I am so tuned into her already; I could probably feel her for at least a mile already. But no one else needs to know that.

"A little when it is mentioned, but not anymore." She replies, and then shocks me yet again when after studying my responsive nod, she calls me out on reading her emotions. I am starting to understand why I'm mated to her. She is so in tune with everything, she misses nothing. I have never met anyone who could block my power before either. It makes her truly my equal; I can't bend her to my will with only a thought like I can everyone else. And her control!

I'm starting to feel hope that maybe the two of us can find a way out of this mess together. But I squash it fast. I can't let myself feel hope just yet. First I have to see her in action. So I make her fight me. On instinct alone. Something I have never done before. And what does she do? She beats me. She beat ME! The god of war! On the first try! If Maria doesn't kill me on the spot we are so getting out of here! It's just a question of when.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N Woot! My fastest update ever! And finally the answer to the long hanging question who is Bella's husband!** **I am so happy to finally be able to post it! It has been killing me for you all not to know!**

**Also I am so glad to see some screen names I recognize in my reviews! Thank you for sticking with me! **

**I have decided to hold a contest of sorts, whoever submits my 100th review gets to name a character ****to appear later in the story!**

**oh and I don't own Twilight.**

BPOV

I must say that my life flashing before my eyes was the strangest thing that I had yet experienced. That really is what it was. A flash. Exploding from within and flooding my mind. Blinding my senses of all else. Even the writhing man I once loved diapered from my sight. Though my eyes where still focused on him. It only lasts a few moments, but in that small span of time I remember everything, and I am temporarily stunned, as I sink into the blurred and distant memories of my old life_._

_I grew up in the northern outskirts of Aberdeen Washington. My father Charles would work long hours as the sheriff of the dangerous bar riddled, fishing town. My mother Rene bestowed with the task of being a homemaker, doing housework, and raising me and eventually my little brother Zackary. Along with teaching me to read, write and everything else I would need to know in order to become a smart resourceful and independent woman. Meaning I spent a lot of time cooking, learning to run the house, and studying._

_Rene was always a free spirit. And over the years she came to resent my father, blaming him for trapping her in such a dreary little town. And though my father loved her dearly their marriage was not a happy one. He slowly began to pull away from her, becoming more distant as time progressed. After a while he would hardly ever looking up from his paper during dinner. Quite a change from the jolly father I remember from my early childhood. He would dance around the kitchen singing with me in one arm and my mother in the other. Though I loved my mother dearly I did not blame him for the change. _

_Because of all the problems with their marriage, my mother had also come to resent societies ideal of marrying young. Matches that where for the most part, made out of convenience rather than love. Or as in my parents case where wed before they were old enough to know that first love dose not in many cases equal true love. This was the last thing she wanted for me, and she made quite a point out of giving me the highest amount of education she could manage. Saying that being a teacher myself for a few years would be for my benefit. She even brought in tutors to help with the subjects she was unsure of. Explaining that, "The school in town was lacking, and much too far away for me to walk with all the drunks around." She however was not strict during my upbringing. Often saying, "Independence requires independence." I believe she took that to heart a bit more than I did however, for she would often disappear for hours at a time, nearly always leaving me alone to tend to the house. Being alone was not the safest thing for me however. I was clumsy, and often would end up injured. Whether it was from tripping over the rug, or down the stairs, or even burning myself on the stove, there was always something. It was just a part of my life that I learned to live with._

One such incident stood out in my memories, and it was easy to see why my new mind would focus on it. The thought of my own blood intrigued me. Such a change from the past where the same thought had always left me feeling ill.

_That incident had left me limping for a week, and physically scared for the rest of my days. It was a lovely mid-summer afternoon when it happened. I stood by the kitchen window, chopping carrots in preparation for a dinner stew. I remember that I had been drifting off into daydreams as I stared out the window longingly. The sky was a perfect robin's egg blue, and I most definitely was not paying the carrots the amount of attention they were owed. Somewhere in the back of my head I knew that. However in that moment all I wanted to do was get that stew on to cook as quickly as I could. So I could take a blanket and a book out to the lovely grass outside the window and soak up the sun. _

_Suddenly the knife slipped from my hands, clattering on the edge of the table before falling blade down, towards the floor. What it encountered however was my foot, causing a neat two inch gash to open up in the top of it. Blood was pumping out of it before I even realized what had happened. I remember I almost passed out from the bitter sweet rusty smell of it. I had to bandage it myself, and then ride bareback to the doctors so he could stich me up. Dr. Cullen was the best doctor anyone in the town had ever seen, young and eligible, and almost painfully handsome, with skills that could not be matched. All the woman in town wanted him, and he often teased that I would injure myself just so I could see him. To which I would blush and remind him "Clumsy does not need a reason." He rushed out to help me the second my horse was in front of his tree lined office. Lifting me down with ease and carrying me inside while an assistant tended to my horse. He tended to me with ease and a familiarity brought on by the many visits I had made to him. I required quite a few stiches that day, but the way he stitched me up I hardly noticed the pain. _

_Angela Webber was my best friend growing up. Her father was the minster of our local church, and many a Sunday afternoon was spent in her company. Our activity's changing over the years, but our friendship stayed the same, we were each other's rock. A lot of times it felt like we were the only ones that truly understood the other. Angela and I often seemed an entirely different breed from the other girls in town. I often felt bad for Angela for having to go to school when I did not. She was often picked on by the other girls, and spent many an afternoon crying on my shoulder. She always kept a good public face however, and no one but me ever saw how much those girls really affected her. Despite all that we really where happy growing up, always putting in a good effort not to let life's little trials get us down._

_Angela and I always had our noses in a book. Thankfully my mother had a quite impressive collection of novels. That along with the Weatherwax library, kept us quite entertained. Weathering Heights was always my favorite however, and every few months I would pull it out and reread it as if for the first time._

_When I was 13 my mother announced that she was pregnant. I was ecstatic to no longer be an only child, but also a bit worried. Though my parents loved me, with my father's work and mother's independence, I had in a lot of ways ended up raising myself. I was concerned that I would end up raising the baby as well. However it seemed to have the opposite effect, and my mother ended up being around a lot more after Zackary was born, what with having to breast feed and all. Zach was all boy, and seemed to also have been born with the same clumsiness that I was plagued with. Our visits to Dr. Cullen doubled when he learned to walk. But like me he took his injuries like a champ, wearing his scars like a badge of honor. _

_The Witherdale's moved into town when I was 16. John Witherdale was a widower, who had moved to town for some new scenery after his beloved wife Rachel passed away. His 18 year old son came along with him. Saying somebody's got to look out for the old man. That was all the town really knew about them though. Well besides their occupation. They were hunters, and would track down large herds of elk and other wildlife, selling their meat at the local shops, whose owners where very grateful for the product. They made good money that way, I'm sure._

_I had heard about them long before I saw them. John I heard was a drinker, but a polite one. So no one paid much mind to that fact, what with his wife having passed and all. 'Let him morn in peace', is how my father put it. His son was a polite young man. Never got into any trouble, but tended to spend a lot of time alone._

_I remembered the first time I saw him clear as a slightly foggy day. I was walking home from the market, and he passed by going the opposite direction. I knew it was him at once because of Angela's description, she had been right he was handsome. He smiled at me and tipped his hat as he passed. Anyway it was a brief meeting, hardly one to write home about, but one that would be played over in my head frequently in the months to come._

_It was that next Sunday in church that I saw him again. His father and him ended up seated in the pew across from ours, and he kept smiling over at me during the sermon. I don't think my father noticed though. He would have never introduced us the way he did later that day if he had._

_Soon after__ we met__ he asked my father__ for__ permission to court me. Charles was not very pleased by the idea, but after seeing the plead__ing look on my face he relented. Giving his permission for us to see each other once a week, as was my mother's condition. Rene wanted little to do with 'the boy' as she often referred to him. She was afraid he would trap me. I on the other hand couldn't h__ave cared less. Unlike my_ _mother I did not mind liv__ing in the small town on the harbor__. I was content there, and to be quite honest I was afraid I would never find someone who I could talk__ to as openly as I could Angela__ if I moved away._

_By this time Angela to was courting. A boy by the name of Ben Cheney had stolen her heart. Everyone thought very highly of their romance and had high hopes for them as a couple. We would often all go out together, buying us a little time away from the prying eyes of our family's, and the boorish confines of our sitting rooms._

_He proposed to me one afternoon while we were taking a stroll through the woods near my house. I am guessing that he had already asked the permission of my father, for I remember thinking it strange that we were allowed our privacy that day._

_My fathers angered reaction when I returned with a ring on my finger said that he had not expected me to say yes. The last days spent in my home where filled with contention, the constant debate over my future hanging heavy in the air._

_The wedding was on a beautiful June afternoon. It was a simple service, and just to my liking. It was held at the church I had sat in every Sunday since I could remember, with Pastor Webber preforming the ceremony. Angela was standing at my side, with John across from her. My father politely gave me away. Though he still insisted that I could do better, he would never say so in public, and most of the day for him was spent in a dutiful silence._

Now looking back, I realize I should have listened to his and my mother's pleas to reconsider. It's so easy now to see that that was the day I signed my fate.

_After we were married, my new husband decided that he wanted to see the world and try his hand at hunting some new game. My mother was thrilled that I would no longer be stuck in one place like she was, and with that assurance she finally accepted my choice in getting married so young. I on the other hand wasn't so thrilled. Sure it was something we had discussed as a possibility before the wedding. But sometimes talk and realities are different things. The talks we had all seemed to be far off fantasies that would never come to pass. And now being that we were wed I had little say in the matter. So using my savings he goes and buys a pair of train tickets. His father tags along with us. They say they have already seen most of the eastern states, along with the Yukon, where Rachel passed away. So it was settled upon that we would head south. So after a tearful farewell and much skirt holding from Zach, we head out. State by state, we traveled down. First Oregon, then California, thankfully we skipped the great desert in Nevada, always finding a way to sell the meat and pelts to gain our fare to the next hunting spot on the map. Sometimes we would travel by train others by coach, only ever stopping in a town large enough to rent a mule and wagon, for 'our next big hunting adventure.'_

_It wasn't until we hit Northern California that I realized that all that time in Aberdeen he had indeed been hunting. Hunting for a wife, someone to cook the meals, do the laundry, and keep the camp while the two of them where off hunting. Someone to take Rachel's place, I often wondered about what Rachel's fate had been. John had slowly gotten over her loss, and would disappear on the nights we spent in a town's inn. I kept my mouth shut but always knew those nights where spent in the brothels._

_During the hunting trips I was always left armed with a pistol, told to protect the camp at all costs. As soon as they returned however the pistol was taken away, and I would be told that it was not safe for a lady to carry a gun... That always seemed a bit of a double standard to me. Not that I would tell him that. In fact over the months I ended up telling him less and less of anything. And it seemed that I was turning into my mother but in opposite ways. Where she had resented my father for keeping her cooped up in a small town, I resented my husband for taking me away from it, for dragging me into wilds all across the country, and for leaving me alone in them. I was terrified whenever they left. Of course I knew how to use the pistol; my father had made sure of that. But I wasn't sure I would be able to use it if the need ever arose. To actually cause harm, or kill another person or even an animal was quite simply not in my nature. And though I quite obviously had no quarrel with those who hunted, it was never something I could do myself. I wasn't sure what I would do if we were ever robed, or if I was ever attacked. I just knew I would hear it if I didn't do something. So whenever they left I would pray, that the next living creature I would see would be them returning. Funny thing is it looks like in a twisted way that prayer was answered._

_It was our second night in Texas when it happened, and not in a way I had ever imagined. We had made camp in a little thicket of shade trees, grouped neatly at the bottom of a hill, just a few miles east of El Paso. The men had left early that morning, and I had been alone all day, reading and washing our clothes in a little nearby stream. They had yet to return as evening set in, and the dinner I had prepared_

_was beginning to get cold. I was not worried for them though, this was just another thing to get used to when braving the wilds with those two. I was however worried for myself. As evening set in I began to feel a sense of impending doom. There was no where I could go out here, miles from anywhere however. So I tried to calm myself down with keeping busy. I settled myself down with the fire at my back. Both as protection and to allow my eyes to better adjust in the dark. With the pistol loaded at my side I dug into my mending, stitching up a skirt of mine that had acquired a big tare, and glancing up every few seconds to peer into the ever increasing darkness._

Somehow I now find it fitting, that all-encompassing darkness. Taking over and blacking out everything. Like the darkness that had been slowly creeping in during the past few months, closing in and suffocating me, all the while the pitch black creeping closer and closer. The demon emerging from its unseen depths to do me harm.

"_Hello there." A musical voice rang out from the dark._

_I jumped about a foot in the air, my mending dropping into the dirt forgotten. A small giggle came from the night, and a figure slowly emerged from its shadows. I rose to my feet anxiously my pistol firmly held behind my back._

_It was easy to tell from the voice that it was a young woman, but that did little to appease my fright. Her cheerful voice, only served to raise suspicion. A woman out this far all alone should not sound that happy. I should know. I had heard plenty of stories of the woman being used as a decoy. So the men could sneak up and rob you. She could just be happy to have come across another woman, rather than a man, argued the side of my brain that wanted to think good of everybody. It was a reasonable enough explanation, yet my mind was still leaning towards option number one. It was almost as if I could smell the danger radiating off of her and I had yet to even see her face._

_My hand tightened around the handle of my gun as she stepped into the ring of light created by the campfire. She was beautiful, I'll give her that. She had a head full of__soft curls, and a body full of gra__ce. Her hair was dark and left to fall freely around her shoulders. Her skin was a glowing ivory in the fire light. I had never been much into fashion, but even I could tell her dress would be the envy of every woman she met. This to__o__ set the warning bells __in my head ringing. That fine a dress out here without even the smallest wrinkle or smudge of dirt? It just didn't make any sense. The men had been_ _specifically warned that there would be no one out this far, and if there was to watch out. She had to have __come in a wagon. Yet where was the wagon? I had after all heard nothing, and in my heightened state of unease I had been listening fairly hard._

_She continued to come closer, and I looked away from her fine dress to finally meet her gaze. What I found when my eyes meet hers made my blood run cold, and a gasp of pure fright to pass my lips. Her gaze was hard, predatory even in its intensity, and while her smile remained full of joy and friendliness her eyes where cold and dead, inhuman even. The more I stared into them the more I came to realize that they were indeed inhuman._

_The last memory of my life is of the devil. Disguised as an angle, but the devil none the less. For the devil takes many forms. Her beautiful face leaned in, a wicked grin replacing her soft smile. I screamed as her teeth tore into my flesh. I screamed in terror, and then I screamed in pain. The last thing I heard before the fire consumed me was the devils laughter._

I wonder if he had cried when he came back and found me gone. Somehow I rather doubt it. Rather he was more mystified over my vanishing without a trace. Either way there was no more questions now, he was back in my 'life'.

"James." I let out in a gasp as I sink to the floor, the shock of the moment making it hard to stay on my feet, and once again all eyes were turned on me. The room was deafening in its silence. Staring eye's boring into me. Even James had ceased his tormented wailing, and the eeriness of the sudden silence made my skin crawl. My head was spinning; even with my now overly large brain capacity all that new information was overwhelming. The eyes that studied me made me want to flinch away but I struggled to remain still. Only letting my eyes dart around from face to face and then back to James. Jaspers confused stare was the worst of all. There was something in his eyes that I couldn't quite read. Something dangerous and untamed, and though I had an instinctual knowledge that he would not harm me, I was afraid. There was so much more I had to learn still, I hardly knew what was going on. What I did know was that I was in danger and in it deep.

Maria was watching me with an evil smirk, and I knew she had brought James here on purpose. However the reasoning as to why she had done this was a mystery to me, and had just become number one on my list of things to find out. I had a feeling Jasper knew, and I hoped he would tell me. The answer to this one question seemed so much more important than the rest. Like a big piece of the puzzle that was now my life lay in its discovery. Why would she bring my husband here? Change him into what I now was. I didn't know much about human army's and I was sure vampire army's differed greatly, but it made no sense having a husband and wife fighting side by side. To me it seemed like she was begging for trouble. I could feel the answer clawing at me trying to be heard, but it was just out of range, taunting me.

"GAWWWWW!" James back arced of the floor, as another piercing cry filled the cavern. Breaking the silence, and causing a few sets of piercing red eyes to shift away from me. Jasper cast Maria a questioning look, confirming my suspicions that something was wrong with this situation. He then turned to James, inspecting him it seemed. He looked over his wrists and ankles, before giving Maria a nod. Then without a word he turns away from James dying body and calls the army to attention.


End file.
